cuckholmfic

(set: $day to 0)When the boy steps into the depths of the church of his own free will, the priest doesn't take it as a sign. The King of Heroes does. "Is this not your perfect opportunity?" he asks, gesturing at the unconscious body the priest is holding upright. "Your chance to finally see this new fascination of yours up close?" He grins, a spark in his eye the priest hasn't seen in years. "Your chance to delve into the inner workings of the Emiya you lost once before?" The priest takes a moment to consider, eyes closed in reflection. "Perhaps," he finally says. "Let me [[try something]]." (set: $day to 1)

[[Emiya Shirou]] is bound in the church basement, unconscious. [[Kotomine Kirei]] is examining an array of tools. [[Gilgamesh]] has something planned for the evening.

you wake up alone, in the dark, hands held above your head by something that clinks when you try to move. you don't know where you are. the last thing you remember is-- (link-reveal:"something")[ (link-reveal:"terrible")[ (link-goto:"in the")]]

An Emiya appearing on your doorstep is not to be taken for granted. You've been waiting for a chance to get closer to the boy since the Grail War started, but with other matters to attend to, you've only been able to have a few chance encounters. [[Until now.]]

Kirei had initially instructed his Lancer to meet Saber at the church's entrance. In another world, this might have happened. Perhaps they would have fought, and circumstances would have been changed. But in this world, Gilgamesh chose to volunteer himself for the task, eager to see Saber again, to face her with true, serious intent. And this is how it [[begins.]]

[[basement.]]

you hold back the bile in your throat. you'd just end up vomiting on yourself, without enough slack in the chains to lean forward. you're enough of a mess as it is. you should probably [[call saber.]]

you feel for the magic in your hand, calling it forth in the shape of the command spell, asking for (link-reveal:"help.")[ you feel (link-reveal:"nothing.")[ "saber!" you (link-reveal:"yell.")[ you hear [[nothing]].]]]

then there's a light, so bright that you're blinded for a moment before you make out a figure on the opposite end of the room. it comes closer. [[it's not saber.]]

"you're awake," kotomine says. "what do you want?" you ask, dreading the answer. you know his secret now, you know what he keeps under the church. you're going to [[die]].

you twist your hands to try and grab hold of the chains, but they're too short to allow it. you might be able to break them if you can reach through the shackles on your wrists, but it will take too much time, not with kotomine right there, coming [[closer-]]

you try to land a kick on him, but he's in your space before you get the chance, and suddenly you (link-reveal:"can't breathe")[ you curl in on yourself as his fist collides with your stomach. you taste blood. you struggle for air. you can barely make a sound before it happens (link-reveal:"again")[ (link-reveal:"and again")[ and [[again]]]]. ]

his punches move from your gut to your jaw, catching it over and over until your teeth rattle. your eyes start to swell shut until you can barely make out the image of kotomine striking you again and again. [[he's smiling.]]

you want to pass out long before you actually do. you don't expect to [[wake up.]] (set: $day to 2)

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 2]] is unconscious, and will want to stay that way. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 2]] has a meeting to attend. [[Gilgamesh->gil 2]] has a few things to consider.

you don't wake up so much as you finally notice that you're conscious. the light is dim, but warm, lighting the room you're in well enough that you can recognize you're definitely not in the room you were trapped in before. for one, this one has furniture - a dresser, a desk, and [[a bed.]]

"Has Saber been eliminated from the Grail War?" You can't help but smile softly at the way Rin's voice shakes, even as her words paint her as impassive, pragmatic, a true heir to the Tohsaka legacy. "It's just as unclear to me as it is to you where Emiya Shirou and his Servant are." She absolutely thinks you're lying. She doesn't *know* you're lying. She slams her hands on the table, forgetting herself. You take in the way her shoulders tremble, and warmth spreads through the stillness of your chest. "You're the overseer. Isn't it your job to know?!" "And I'm already overstepping the bounds of that job by sharing what I know with a Master who's been eliminated, Rin." Her scowl of frustration as she storms from the restaurant is as charming as it's [[always been.]]

"Sacrifice your Lancer," Gilgamesh tells Kirei, "that the Grail will manifest, and I may properly anoint my queen with its contents." Kirei laughs, and Gilgamesh's face twists in irritation. "Is something funny, priest?" "No, King of Heroes," says Kirei. His tone is one that other men would have been struck dead for long ago. "I simply thought that you had more patience in you." "Ten years may be a trifle to me," Gilgamesh says, "but there is no reason for you to delay us any further. Isn't the coming of the Grail in your interest as well? Unless..." Gilgamesh brings a hand to his chin in thought. "You have an idea. [[Speak.]]"

the bed is most obvious, considering that you're [[tied to it.]]

"finally," a voice says, before you can start trying to snap the ropes, "i was starting to think the priest had left you comatose." the gold archer steps through the doorway, closing the gap between you in an instant to grab at the hand glowing with magic. "don't presume you can escape, mongrel. your bonds are a luxury." he grins, all teeth, and you suddenly remember how easily this servant could [[kill you.]]

"what do you want?" you ask, because if kotomine had wanted you dead, you're pretty sure it would have happened by now. "a way to pass the time," gilgamesh says, grabbing you by the chin. [[inspecting you.]]

you try to shake him off, because being grabbed and looked at like this is //weird//, like you're some kind of (link-reveal:"animal.")[ but then again, this man has made it clear enough that he doesn't believe he's on the same level as [[humans.]]]

he slaps you across the face. "stay still, child." your cheek burns, but you keep pressing. "i'm not a master anymore," you say, waving the hand that once held your command seals. "you don't need me." saber must have disappeared by now. there's no one (link:"to protect you")[for you to protect]. gilgamesh laughs, head thrown back, breaking you out of your thoughts. "i don't. but //he// wishes to keep you around." he climbs on top of the bed, puts a hand on [[your chest.]]

"i might as well play with his [[new toy.]]"

your torn, dirty clothes are shredded off of you in seconds, and you yelp, trying to cover up, but your options are limited with your arms bound above your head. "what are you //doing?!//" "you ought to be grateful," gilgamesh says, running a hand down your chest, "not many get to say they've been given such a [[grand gift]]."

you kick, desperate for some kind of resistance, but he grabs one of your ankles with ease and shoves the other one away without looking. "troublesome boy," he says, and you hear the sound of the gate of babylon opening, the sound that must mean you're finally going to be [[killed.]]

you gasp, not because it hurts that much, but because it's //weird//, a sensation you've never felt before, never even considered. "what are you- !" you yelp as he presses the finger in further, curling inside in a way that makes you squirm. "are you truly this ignorant?" he asks, and then your body burns as he starts pressing another finger into you. "surely by now your king has taken her pleasure with you in [[this way.]]"

''(color:red)[(print:$day)]''

but a sword doesn't appear from the golden gate. instead, it's a pot, or a jar of some kind. "you're lucky i even bother," gilgamesh says, dipping his hand into the jar. his hand comes back dripping with something, and you have no idea what its purpose is until he shoves your legs apart further and starts to push a finger [[into you.]]

he smiles, twisting his wrist, and it sends a nauseating wave of //something// up your spine, and a noise bubbles up from your throat. "you certainly take it well, [[after all.]]"

at some point, you find yourself unable to struggle any further. you're exhausted from lack of real sleep. you haven't eaten in days, now. you're at the mercy of a man who's practically a god. so when gilgamesh lifts your legs over his shoulders and starts to push his cock into you, you grit your teeth and [[shut your eyes.]]

this must be revenge for saber. she's definitely disappeared by now, with your command seals gone, so gilgamesh must be taking out his anger on you. and without saber, there's nothing you can do against this man, not to mention kotomine, and his lancer as well. you wonder if you'll be trapped here [[forever.]]

gilgamesh fucks you slowly, more slowly than you would expect from someone so greedy, but it still hurts, stretching you in places that weren't meant to be stretched, prying you open until you feel like your body is splitting apart. your jaw hurts from clenching it. your eyes are starting to prickle with tears. this is wrong, your body isn't supposed to be intruded like this, you're not supposed to [[feel-]]

[[this.]]

this [[feeling.]]

you open your eyes. gilgamesh's face is there, watching you closely, smiling easily, his arms caging you in. "many would kill for this honor," he says, thrusting his hips hard and pushing a grunt out of your throat. "men, women, all sorts have desired my embrace." he puts one hand to your cheek and holds your face so gently, you're not sure if this is the same man who'd nearly cleaved you in half. "i will make you see [[why.]]"

he kisses you, ignoring your clenched teeth. his lips are warm and surprisingly soft- not that it matters. not that you care. you try to turn your head away, but he just moves down your jaw, to your neck, sucking a mark into a pressure point. it feels disgusting, too intimate, too bizarrely gentle for someone this strong, but you can't move away. his breath is hot against your ear when he says, "tell me. how does saber [[taste]]?"

you open your mouth to tell him to fuck off, but a tongue replaces any air you had, diving deep into your mouth, caressing you in places you didn't know had nerves. you start to bite down, but on the next thrust, gilgamesh's cock hits something inside you that makes your legs spasm, and one of his hands has snaked down your body to start touching your cock. you're [[half-hard.]]

(link-reveal:"no.")[ (link-reveal:"no.")[ (link-reveal:"no no no no no no")[ [[no.]]]]]

this is something you have to endure, a punishment you have to accept for being unable to protect saber, a horrible thing that's happening to you being done by a horrible person, you [[can't-]]

gilgamesh sucks on your tongue as he squeezes your cock as he fucks you in long, slow thrusts that keep dragging at your insides in a way that didn't feel good until a few seconds ago. nothing felt good until a few seconds ago. you wait for it to [[stop.]]

you bite your own tongue once his leaves your mouth, desperate to will down your growing erection as he keeps stroking you in just the right way. it's wrong, it's gross, it's //embarrassing//, it's not something anyone is supposed to see, but your whole body is screaming to let this happen, to relax into his touch, to give up on your pride in favor of pain-numbing pleasure that lances through you with each movement of his body. you miss [[her.]]

you try to hold on to an image of her berating your (link-reveal:"weakness.")[ or a memory of her horror at seeing (link-reveal:"this man.")[ or any of the things she said when [[you-]]]]

you get more distracted thinking about her than you probably should, considering the situation, but it's hard not to compare his hard muscles to hers, his warm body above you to her smaller one below you, and you get lost in the mix of feelings, letting yourself crawl slowly towards the edge until you're spilling over it, your body convulsing around the cock inside you in a weak [[surrender.]]

you don't remember much that happens after that, but you think you hear gilgamesh laughing before you start to [[lose your senses.]]

(set: $day to 3)[[" "]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 3]] isn't sure what to expect at this point. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 3]] just bought a new knife sharpener. [[Gilgamesh->gil 3]] has his own entertainment for the evening.

the first cut digs deep into the back of your thigh, waves of burning pain spreading out all across your body as kotomine's knife tears through you. you hold your breath, desperately trying to quell any noise that wants to rise up out of your throat. [[it doesn't work.]]

you shout out loud as the knife plunges into your calf, and it's probably a good thing the chains on your ankles are keeping you in place, because your body wants to writhe and squirm in ways that would probably just open the wound further. you press your cheek into the cold, stone wall, trying to cool the white-hot pain that runs through you. maybe if you hold out for long enough, you'll pass out from [[blood loss.]]

but then, another flash of pain hits you, in the same spot as the cut, but it doesn't feel like the knife again. it feels like a scab being torn open over and over and over, like all your nerves are twitching and convulsing without provocation, and this time, you can't hold back a scream. when the scorching pain starts to fade into a dull ache, you feel kotomine's hand on your leg, running up and down where the cuts were. you don't [[feel them]] anymore.

but just as you start to realize the implications of your healed leg, another hole opens up in your back, right where you're pretty sure a kidney is, and you think you lose consciousness for a few seconds out of sheer agony. when you're aware again, the pain is still there, but you don't feel any blood gushing out of you. you give up on [[bleeding out.]]

(set: $day to 4)after what feels like years, kotomine seals up his last wound, the one in your shoulder, and grabs you by the hair to wrench your face towards his. you stare at him, tears blurring your vision, and try to cough up some kind of insult, or maybe just vomit on his shoes. instead all you manage is to silently watch him smile and walk away, leaving you [[alone again.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 4]] has another night of pleasure to look forward to. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 4]] has the same. [[Gilgamesh->gil 4]] will be very busy with both.

gilgamesh looks disgusted just seeing you. you can't say you blame him. you can't imagine who'd want to see you like this- naked, on your stomach, hands bound behind your back, unfed, unshowered (though you somehow don't feel as filthy as you should, after this much time). you wonder if he'll give up on whatever arrangement he has with kotomine and mercy-kill you. [[no such luck.]]

you hear the sound of magical energy bringing something into existence, and then see gilgamesh holding a small tray. "eat," he says, and holds what looks like a cracker towards your mouth. you can't find it in you to [[refuse.]]

it's dry, a little salty, but you're pretty sure it's the most delicious thing you've ever had. though, the lack of food in what feels like days might help with that. you try to bite back a "thank you" as he gives you [[another.]]

you eat a few more out of his hand before you're full, stomach shrunken from lack of food, and you breathe heavily from the exertion. you're so tired. you can't complain when gilgamesh's fingers touch against your open mouth, tasting of the salted food. you see him smile as you let him push inside. when he removes his hand, there's another rush of magic, and he holds a golden cup. you open your mouth for [[water.]]

when he places the cup to your lips, you only have a moment to notice the color and aroma of the liquid before it's tipped down your throat. it isn't water, but it still tastes good, sweet and fruity, with only a slight bite of- [[alcohol.]]

you don't stop drinking. it's the only liquid you've had since being confined to the church, and despite being tortured and humiliated for all this time, you still can't find it in yourself to commit to suicide. the liquid is thick and warm on your tongue, and your head starts to go fuzzy. maybe you can [[sleep.]]

"kirei doesn't seem to keep his possessions well-maintained," gilgamesh says, and your stomach drops at the word "possession." "i'm-" you start, but gilgamesh puts another glass of liquid to your mouth. "quiet," he says, "you need not complain. you are mine, today, and i won't accept displeasure at my [[treatment."]]

you're not sure what he means by that, but you start to find it harder and harder to concentrate on his words, sated from eating and tired from drinking, and you let your eyes slip shut. you feel warm hands smooth over your lower back, and you prickle uncomfortably. you'll take his food, but if he keeps [[touching you-]]

a slick finger starts to dip into the crack of your ass, and no, //no//, not again, you can't take this again, not when you've been allowed to feel this calm and relaxed for even a few minutes- "i won't say it again," gilgamesh says, as he presses inside you and you bite your tongue, "i won't accept [[displeasure.]]"

you're not sure how he can expect that with how you keep being tortured and probed at without any sort of break, and you open your mouth to tell him as much- but then gilgamesh curls his finger inside you, and it hits that spot you remember from before, the one that makes your whole body tighten up and you let out a low noise. gilgamesh [[smirks.]]

"you're not as strong as you think you are, boy," he says, and keeps pressing inside you, slowly thrusting in and out. "no one is, in the face of [[pleasure.]]"

you will your body to resist, to struggle, to scream at him, but you're so exhausted and your body is already relaxed from alcohol and you want him to touch you there again and again. and he //does//, is the worst part, as a second finger stretches you open in a way that isn't entirely unpleasant. your cock starts to thicken as the unusual pleasure rolls through you, and you squirm a little against the [[sheets.]]

gilgamesh stops moving his hand, and you don't bother holding back a noise of complaint. "no, i don't think that will be allowed, today," he says, and pulls out to flip you onto your back. "you will take your pleasure from [[me and me alone.]]"

it feels like hours pass as he fucks you on just his fingers and you squirm uselessly at the awkward angle. your hands feel like they'll fall asleep, still bound behind your back and now pressed against the bed. gilgamesh doesn't touch you anywhere else, even as your cock becomes fully hard and you can't help but grind your hips uselessly against empty air. it's not enough, it's not enough, this must be some new form of torture you've never heard of, some kind of attempt to leave you needing to be touched for so long that your dick will fall off. you want to [[beg.]]

"stop," you say, because anything else would be giving up. "stop, please, it //hurts!//" gilgamesh doesn't stop, but he does press harder into that spot inside you, and you feel so warm and hungry for it. he laughs as you moan, laughs harder as you bite the inside of your cheek to cut off the sound. "do you really want this to end?" he asks, and you do, you want him to stop, you want him to touch you, you want to be home, you want him to stretch you [[further-]]

he starts fucking you faster, harder, and you start to wonder if you'd be able to come from just this. it'd be (link-reveal:"embarrassing.")[ it'd be (link-reveal:"humiliating.")[ it'd be (link-reveal:"losing.")[ it'd be [[worth it.]]]]]

you want to come, you want this to be over, you want something to feel good in this miserable hell of a church, you can't bring yourself to care about the consequences of giving up this easily. so when gilgamesh angles his hand and your body lights up, you let yourself [[go.]]

you vaguely hear gilgamesh encouraging you as you groan and writhe, your cock twitches with every small movement he makes now, and you feel so hot all over that you think you'll catch fire. and then, something snaps, and you feel yourself coming. it's not a sensation you've ever felt before, coming without being touched at all, and you're not even sure if you like it, but there's a sense of finality to the act, and you can only hope that it's not just a feeling. gilgamesh looks [[almost proud.]]

(set: $day to 9)you want to [[vomit.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 11]] has only started to know pain. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 11]] has many means of giving it. [[Gilgamesh->gil 11]] has his own agenda to attend to.

kotomine's only carrying what looks like a long stick when he enters (link:"your")[the] room today, and you almost breathe a sigh of relief. maybe this will be better than the knife, or the whip, or any of the other instruments he's tried on you. [[you doubt it.]]

the first strike feels like fire across the back of your thighs, like kotomine is trying to slice you in half with a dull knife, like the flexible wooden stick is actually made out of thick, heavy iron. you've given up on holding back your [[screams.]]

there's another strike across your thighs, then one further up, then one on your ass, and every one feels the same as the first, pain burrowing deep into your flesh and staying there. you're not sure how big the bruises will be, but you guess it doesn't matter. by now, you've figured out that saber left behind enough energy to keep healing you, at least [[for now.]]

when it finally stops, it's like a dam is broken, and you sob messily, tears and snot coating your face as you wait for the pain to go down. kotomine presses his thumb into a bruise, and you nearly choke on your tongue. then, he walks away, and you let yourself sniffle pathetically as he [[leaves.]]

until he [[comes back.]]

he's holding two stools, as far as you can tell through your blurry vision. one he sets down, and the other he brings over to you and starts to position you into sitting down on it. it's tall, and your feet dangle, but you don't fight him. there's not much you could do except [[fall off.]]

then, he grabs the other one, and lifts one of your legs to rest it on top of the surface. he still has [[the cane.]]

you have about half a second of realization to try and move before he strikes the sole of your foot, and you think this is what being struck by lightning upside down would feel like- shot after shot of agony lancing up your whole leg and then back down to your foot, pulsating pain as you feel your heartbeat push fresh blood into the mark he's surely left. your leg convulses and moves on its own, and you're not surprised when kotomine grabs you by the ankle to keep you in place, but you are terrified that he might think you'd done it on purpose. though, it's not as though you've deserved any of the [[punishment]] you've gotten so far.

you feel lightheaded, either from the pain or your ragged breathing venturing into hyperventilation. or maybe from seeing kotomine's smile as you [[cry.]]

(set: $day to 14)you wait for [[tomorrow.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 14]] is starting to relax. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 14]] has another meeting. [[Gilgamesh->gil 14]] has a confession.

gilgamesh always gets you off. no matter how much it hurts, no matter how wrong and strange and awful it is, it's never enough to block out how good it feels when he touches you. this time isn't [[any different.]]

you've started to almost enjoy the stretch of your muscles as he forces you open. it feels like the burn of a hard workout, a satisfying ache that only leads to even more pleasure as he pushes you to your [[limits.]]

The knife is an unused piece of a kitchen knife set you don't remember buying. The electric sharpener is one you bought at a shop in town, mostly to irritate Gilgamesh and his collection of fine whetstones that have honed the edges of the greatest weapons of man. Both are proving to be of [[great use.]]

Gilgamesh's first taste of Saber had been as sweet as he'd imagined, and his second is perhaps even sweeter, after sampling her pathetic former Master the previous night. It's difficult to understand what captures Kirei's interest in the boy so thoroughly, but the simple joy of seeing the priest's eyes lit up in pleasure after toying with Emiya for a few hours is enough to assure Gilgamesh that the acquisition was worth the trouble. The little Master – Shirou, he'd heard Saber call him, so //familiar// - clearly had little experience to speak of, with women or otherwise, and it took little effort to overpower with physical force and pleasure both. Kirei's idea to ruin him by feeding into his desperation to escape days of pain and torture through Gilgamesh's administration of sexual satisfaction until he's broken down into a mess of fear and need certainly has its own appeal, but he won't be necessary for Gilgamesh's own project. Saber will bend to Gilgamesh's will through his coaxing [[alone.]]

"You should see him," Gilgamesh says into the back of your neck. "The despair in his face as he lets the pleasure overflow, the pathetic struggle to keep his body from betraying him..." He runs his hands along the lines of your chest. "Exactly to your [[taste.]]"

Kirei has given himself the task of cleaning the boy up after each day spent with him, and Gilgamesh can only assume he heals Shirou as well, judging by how pristine he appears even after all the screaming and sobbing that comes from the basement. Still, Gilgamesh can't help but be appalled at how pathetic the boy looks from only this long without a proper meal. Starvation is a perfectly reasonable method of torture, but without the energy to react properly, he will become very boring to Gilgamesh very quickly. "Eat," he says, holding some bread to Shirou's lips. And the boy does, graciously, but not without some suspicion in his eyes as he chews and swallows with difficulty. He must be thirsty. Gilgamesh offers him a [[drink.]]

You've settled into a comfortable routine by now. You do with Emiya what you will, wait for him to fall unconscious from either the severity of the pain or the sheer exhaustion, then take him upstairs for a bath. You watch intently as the cuts and bruises start to heal, and think it a pity that nothing seems to [[scar.]]

Perhaps he'd underestimated Saber. Perhaps her resilience has been tested enough in life that she does not bend so easily to Gilgamesh's will. Or perhaps she has already cracked, but her reactions are not anywhere near as obvious or as pleasing as he would like. Either way, it's [[infuriating.]]

"She and Lancer are the only Servants left, and there's no sign of him either!" Rin shouts, her voice frayed with harsh static over the phone's connection. "And if the Grail had been claimed, you must have known about it!" "I can assure you, the Grail has not been won." You sip at your morning coffee. She's called early today. Quiet birdsong fills the cloister outside. "So either the boy has forfeit the war and gone into hiding, or..." He can hear Rin's scowl. "Fine. I knew you wouldn't [[help.]]"

"I have to admit," Gilgamesh says, admiring the way Shirou shivers under him with Gilgamesh's breath so close to his ear. "You take this much better than [[Saber does.]]"

you woke up without any ropes or chains around you today, but he was already in the room by the time you opened your eyes, so you didn't have any chance to realize you could escape, much less try. though, even if you had the chance, you're not sure if you (link:"want to")[would survive the attempt.] until you're given that chance again, you don't see any reason to [[stop him.]]

you're flat on your stomach with him slowly thrusting inside you, occasionally pressing down on your back with his hands in a soothing massage. you're grateful that the bruises from kotomine's earlier flogging have already [[healed.]]

you're starting to get close enough to start digging your fingers into the sheets [[when-]]

"i have to admit," gilgamesh (link-reveal:"says.")[ "you take this much better than [[saber does.]]"]

[[saber?]]

[[saber.]]

//[["saber?!"]]//

it's an awkward angle, but you manage to twist your body around and throw a fist towards him. (link-reveal:"saber's alive")[ (link-reveal:"saber's here")[ [[saber's being-]]]]

your fist collides with [[his hand.]]

"perhaps i was wrong," he says. you feel something in your hand crack. "perhaps you're more alike than [[i thought.]]"

he grabs both of your wrists and slams them into the bedframe, pinning you easily with one hand. you know he's stronger than you, that he could kill you with a snap of his fingers, but suddenly that [[doesn't matter.]]

"where is she?!" he laughs, and then starts fucking you again, hard and fast, unlike the smooth strokes he'd been giving you before. "why do you care?" "tell me, you bastard!" it hurts. it hurts more than anything he's done to you so far. "let me ask you again," he says, and reaches underneath you to grab at your cock. "[[why do you care?]]"

[["after all,"]]

you shudder, trying to will his touch not to feel [[like it does.]]

"haven't you found someone you [[vastly prefer?]]"

he wraps his free hand around [[your throat.]]

you try not to [[beg for something.]]

(set: $day to 17)[[you're not sure what.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 17]] wants to scream out his frustrations. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 17]] can help with that. [[Gilgamesh->gil 17]] has frustrations of his own.

you know saber's here now. you know they won't let her die. you know excalibur's sheath is still inside you, healing you, undoing the damage from every day of kotomine's torture, easing the ache and burn of every time gilgamesh fucks you. you should probably be [[grateful.]]

[[you're not.]]

you don't want to turn around when you hear the door open today. you've learned by now that bracing for whatever kotomine has planned for you [[never works.]]

so you're not surprised when you feel a stabbing pain of something entering the skin of your back, pushing and tearing through muscle, and then come out a few centimeters next to the entry wound, but that doesn't stop it from hurting like [[hell.]]

but unlike the knives he's so fond of, that slice or pierce your body before leaving behind a wound to bleed openly, whatever he's doing to your skin stays inside. you feel the pressure of something larger than a needle force its way under your skin, slowly, slowly following the same path of the first bite of pain, before it finally finishes its journey. kotomine tugs on it, and you choke on a ragged breath. it's a [[piercing.]]

you've never heard of someone being pierced on their back of all places, but you're certain that's what it is, a ring for kotomine to pull and prod as he wishes. you wonder if avalon will heal around it, making it permanent, or if it will reject the foreign object, forcing the ring to slowly exit your body. you're not sure [[which would be worse.]]

before you can acclimatize yourself to the pain, as you always somehow manage to do, there's another pinch and the stab of a needle again, a bit below the first wound. you grit your teeth and try not to ask [[how many more.]]

you lose count of them quickly, each piercing blurring into the next in an agonizing string of pain, each ring followed by a strong tug that keeps you waiting for your flesh to tear every time. either your pain tolerance has increased since this started, or avalon keeps you from passing out (another unhelpful side effect would be just what you'd expect at this point), because you're still lucid enough to realize when [[he's done.]]

your whole back is on fire, but the gap between piercings has now gone long enough that you think you might be free. the piercings might still be there, but you think you can handle it, as long as kotomine doesn't [[touch them anymore.]]

[[he does.]]

there's the tugging sensation at your back again, but softer, less precise, and you feel kotomine's fingers playing at your back in a back and forth pattern across your back. kotomine is humming to himself, now. you're not sure you've ever heard anything more [[terrifying.]]

there's a few more moments of uncomfortable touching and pulling, and then kotomine stops, steps back, and breathes a soft sigh. and then, [[everything happens at once.]]

you feel like you're being flayed alive. the piercings are all being pulled at the same time, harder and harder with every second, and you can't do anything but scream and writhe- but every involuntary movement only makes it worse. your skin feels taut, thin, ready to snap at any moment, but it doesn't. instead, you feel it [[stretch.]]

you think you hear muscles snapping and breaking. you think you hear something creaking like a tree about to fall. you think you hear kotomine laughing. you might be hearing things, so high on adrenaline and emergency endorphins and whatever else your brain is pumping into your broken body. but you [[might not.]]

and then, [[it breaks.]]

you feel no pain for a few moments. you don't feel the piercings anymore. then your torn and distended flesh starts [[screaming.]]

[[there's a hole in you.]]

you feel blood fall freely down your legs, and you wonder if it's enough to finally leave you [[unsconscious.]]

(set:$day to 24)[[it isn't.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 24]] needs some rest. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 24]] has that luxury. [[Gilgamesh->gil 24]] has concern for his own luxuries.

You've been interested in modifying Emiya's body for some time now. Cutting something off, perhaps, or attaching something new to him. You're curious about what limits his healing factor, but more than that, you'd like to surprise Gilgamesh. Whether he would be pleased or not is [[anyone's guess.]]

Saber is much more vocal with a blade in her side. He's grown tired of her coy plays at indifference, her refusal to gracefully accept the gifts she's been given. And he tires especially of how stubbornly she still clings to her worthless pride compared to her docile former Master. Shirou's rage at being told that his sweet Saber was being held in the same prison as him has not entirely calmed, but Gilgamesh can see it dull with each passing day, slowly eroding as he's swept over and over into a sea of pleasure. ...Though Shirou's circumstances are different from Saber's. Instead of the pure and unrelenting assault of carnal desire Gilgamesh has been giving her, Shirou has been subject to both the worlds of agony and delight in equal measure. Gilgamesh will not admit to having made a //mistake//, but perhaps a change of plan is [[in order.]]

you don't expect gilgamesh to apologize. but you expect even less for him to [[suck your dick.]]

"Please," you hear from Gilgamesh's room as you walk by, "Please, please, please, //ah-//" You don't often listen in on Gilgamesh's time with him. You have, of course, a vested interest in the breakdown of Emiya's will, but most of Gilgamesh's part in the process isn't as appealing as your own. [[This, however.]]

Gilgamesh is naturally confident in every one of his divine assets, but chief among these is his mouth. (link-reveal:"women ")[(who aren't Saber) ]have begged for his kisses, (link-reveal:"men ")[(who aren't Saber) ]have cherished his marks, (link-reveal:"friends ")[(as if Saber could ever earn that distinction) ]have had some very choice remarks on the subject. So when the full realization of his true position makes Shirou turn cold, Gilgamesh decides to grant him [[warmth.]]

he's been more gentle with you lately- not overtly, but in small ways. kisses that don't become bites. extra time preparing you. wringing a second orgasm out of you after slowly working you up to it, rather than tearing it out of you through brute force. you try to hold onto what he's [[done to saber.]]

today, your wrists are tied above your head in soft, silky material, loose enough that you could probably break out with only mild dislocation of your wrist. but then you'd have to [[stop gilgamesh.]]

his mouth is so warm and wet, enveloping you perfectly as he takes you into his throat. his hands are planted firmly on your hips to keep you from bucking, and it's probably a good thing they are. you can't imagine what he'd do if you made him gag. you swear as his throat tightens around you, and he laughs in response. it's almost [[charming.]]

it's a (link-reveal:"distraction.")[ you (link-reveal:"know it is.")[ you want it [[so much.]]]]

it's so easy to sink into the soft bed and let this happen, to let your body feel so good that all thoughts seem to [[disappear.]]

you have the chance to [[stop this.]]

you have the chance to [[say no.]]

you have the chance to [[fight for saber.]]

(link:"no")[(link:"enough")[(link:"i can't")["please"]<please|]] (click:?please)[(goto:"please")]

gilgamesh holds your cock tight, and says, in the most commanding tone you've heard, even from him: //[["please, my king."]]//

... (live:3s)[(stop:)(link-reveal:"please")[, (link-reveal:"my")[ (link-reveal:"king.")[ (live:1s)[(goto:"hueh")]]]]]

[["please, my king."->blease]]

there's a long pause, long enough for you to try to regret what you've said, but then gilgamesh is mouthing at you perfectly, taking you deep enough that you see your entire cock disappear, and before you can even warn him you're coming down his throat, spilling what feels like all of yourself into him, moaning with satisfaction as he swallows you down. you feel [[claimed.]]

(set:$day to 33)[[it's not unpleasant.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 33]] is at a breaking point. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 33]] wishes to be the one to break him. [[Gilgamesh->gil 33]] has his own toy to break.

the first cut doesn't hurt. it's a shallow slice across your wrist, barely drawing any blood. the knife is small, almost delicate. you wait for the [[next one.]]

You enjoy the simplicity of a knife to flesh. Deep wounds or shallow incisions, straight lines or meandering patterns, all manners of bloodletting are interesting in their own way. Today, you're considering the appeal of [[quantity over quality.]]

Shirou has accepted Gilgamesh as his rightful monarch. He greets his king with reverence, voices his graciousness for Gilgamesh's gifts, and looks on him with need as he leaves. He won't rebel again. Saber, however, has only grown colder. Her eyes have gone blank and unseeing in Gilgamesh's presence, and he's unable to tease her voice out no matter how he chooses to torment her. It's not wholly unpleasant to own an impassive doll with her face, but her protests tasted so much sweeter. He knows he'll reach the end of his patience soon, and demand Kirei supply him with the Grail, but for the moment, he is still [[entertained.]]

kotomine watches your face carefully after he makes the second cut, barely a centimeter below the first one. blood drips down your wrist towards the inside of your elbow. then he makes (link-reveal:"another.")[ then (link-reveal:"another.")[ and (link-reveal:"another.")[ [[more and more.]]]]]

your arm hurts, now, each cut splitting you open more and more, the pain stretching through you every time you flex your half-numb fingers, having had them held above your head again. you feel like you've been accordion folded, each cut making your skin feel stretched and used. you don't expect it to get [[any better.]]

by now, you know trying to save your pride by holding back your shouting and crying doesn't actually help. kotomine always gets something out of you, eventually, and he looks even more smug when you manage to hold out for any length of time. tears fall so easily, now. it's almost [[cathartic.]]

it's hard to think of anything but the pain once he starts on your other arm, still the same shallow slices every few centimeters. a recipe for potatoes that you once found in a western cookbook comes to mind. maybe kirei plans to stuff the slits with something. maybe you'll just be salted heavily. you start [[laughing.]]

there's a "please" spilling out of your mouth before you can stop it. gilgamesh pulls back, and you whine, trying to clear your head. [["say it again."]]

kotomine finishes both arms and starts cutting across your chest. the cut is a little jagged from your chest heaving with sobbing laughter, the knife catching and tearing outside of a clean, straight line. it [[only gets worse.]]

you can't stop moving as kotomine's blade digs into you, long stretches of bloody lines all the way across your chest. they don't come out perfectly straight, knife twisting this way and that with every harsh breath you take, and you're not sure whether you want to try to stop moving to make it hurt less or keep screwing up kotomine's progress. it isn't really a choice, [[in the end.]]

with every new cut, breathing becomes harder, more painful, and it only makes you more hysterical. the blood dripping down your chest pools in every crevice- though you have fewer defined lines of your body, now. you can't exercise like this. you've definitely lost weight, from how little gilgamesh feeds you, when he does. you wonder if you can ask for a little more, [[next time.]]

gilgamesh has been so kind. you were so angry with him, for a little while, but his kindness is the only thing that's been worth this miserable new existence. the only thing that makes enduring kotomine's turn with you worthwhile. also, the only thing you have, besides kotomine, but you still [[appreciate it.]]

kotomine starts on your legs once he's sliced open your stomach adequately. you wonder if your guts will spill out again if you keep laughing. your whole body hurts. even where kotomine hasn't cut yet. every minute movement sends a ripple effect of pain through each cut as your body twitches and writhes. you just have to [[wait.]]

wait long enough, and it will be (link-reveal:"over.")[ wait long enough, and you will be (link-reveal:"healed.")[ wait long enough, and you'll have [[gilgamesh]] instead.]]

the tops of your feet get cut. two cuts for each toe. you feel warm all over, blood spilling down and coating your unbroken skin, caking on to make movement even more uncomfortable. you can't see kotomine's face through your blurred vision, though whether it's from tears or blood loss is anyone's guess. kotomine runs a finger down your chest, catching every jagged line with a nail, and you wish you could [[give up.]]

(set: $day to 34)you [[wait for tomorrow.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 34]] is waiting. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 34]] has something to wait for. [[Gilgamesh->gil 34]] is impatient as always.

you wake up on your stomach, wrists and ankles bound, and immediately feel [[safe.]]

You've owned Emiya for over a month, now. It's time for a [[test.]]

"//Please//," Shirou moans, muffled through the walls, "//More, more, ah-!//" Saber's eyes are alight for the first time in weeks, her jaw working as she attempts to scream. The muffled sound of her former master's name does nothing to stop the boy from enjoying his time with Kirei. Gilgamesh gropes at her lazily from behind, toying with her small breasts just to feel her ragged breathing. "It's no wonder he left you, you know." Gilgamesh purrs, one hand trailing below her waist as the other comes up to rest on her throat. "You never could have given him the pleasure he [[craved.]]"

the last time you were awake, kotomine's torture had been enough to leave you shaking and sobbing, twitching in pain with every breath. you'd been through worse pain, but it had been so slow, so drawn out, every inch of skin slowly blooming into misery until your whole body felt like a single exposed nerve. but it's over, now. it's [[gilgamesh's turn.]]

you want him to hold you. you want him to kiss you. you want him to touch you. you want him to take you. you enjoy almost everything he does to you, now. you never would have though having something inside you would feel so good, but gilgamesh seems to know everything about the human body and how to touch it in all the right ways. you've even started to enjoy letting him use your mouth, on the occasions he does; he always sounds so satisfied, so pleased with you. your king is [[so kind.]]

your cock is trapped against your stomach in this position, and you start idly rutting against the sheets with nothing else to do until he arrives. maybe you should wait for him, but maybe he'll be pleased to see you ready for him already, maybe he'll enjoy seeing you [[like this.]]

by the time you hear the door open, you're already almost fully hard, and you bend your body the best you can to get in a comfortable position if he wants to take you right away. then, you [[turn your head.]]

(link-reveal:"gilgamesh")[ [[isn't there.]]]

"no," you say, before you can stop yourself. "no, it's, it's his turn, isn't it?" "i don't believe we ever made an arrangement like that," kotomine says, shutting the door behind him. "please." your voice comes out so weak. "please, not again, i've barely healed, //please//." kotomine [[laughs.]]

"i can't take it, not today, i need-" you choke, your breath going shallow, your vision blurring. you try to plead further, but it's so hard to breathe, just looking at him. you gave up on begging for mercy from him a long while back, but the break in routine is making you dizzy and afraid. kotomine steps over to the bedside, and places one hand on the small of your back. [["what do you need?"]]

his hand is warm, and large, and you've been waiting for someone to touch you since you woke up, and even though it's not the person you're used to, you can't help but lean into it. "it looks like you know what you want already," kotomine says. your breathing starts to slow. "please," you say, softly, muffled by the mattress. [["please, what?"]]

his hand moves so lightly up your spine, and goosebumps break out along your skin everywhere he touches. it feels good- any kind of touch that doesn't hurt feels good, now. you wonder how his fingers would feel. you [[grit your teeth.]]

kotomine reaches to the side, and comes back with a jar you remember seeing gilgamesh set down on a bedside table. "please, what?" he repeats, dipping his hand inside. you wonder what his cock [[looks like.]]

"please don't hurt me," you say, and immediately regret it. you sound like a little kid. "and what do you suggest i do, then?" kotomine asks. you're still hard. you want gilgamesh here. but you'll take [[this]] instead of whatever other torture kotomine might have planned.

"fuck me," you say, before you can stop yourself, "please, you can fuck me, you can do whatever you want to me, i just don't want to hurt, //please//." as if waiting for you to give him permission, kotomine immediately slides a slick finger to tease at your rim, pressing barely a fingertip inside. "this is [[what you want?]]"

you groan, moving your hips slightly to get him to push in further. even just one of his fingers is thicker than gilgamesh's, you can tell. kotomine doesn't move any further. "are you satisfied with this?" you want him dead. you want to [[be dead.]]

"please," you whine into the mattress, "please, fuck me, please-" kotomine shoves two fingers in at once, and it burns. it hurts. you [[need it.]]

"more," you say after just a few thrusts, "more, please, //fuck//." kotomine opens you up roughly, but it just feels so good not to be beaten or cut open or any of the other things kotomine has done to you. this is what you [[want.]]

you beg and moan and plead your way to what you need, until you're pushing back against his fingers, seeking out more and more. he [[gives you more.]]

you think your mouth says //thank you// as he finally starts to slide into you a minute later, his clothes roughly shoved out of the way. he's thicker than gilgamesh, though he doesn't reach as deep, but you don't care, it all feels so good right now, just having something back where it belongs is all you need. you let your mind [[wander.]]

it feels so right like this. it feels so good to let go. the only pain you feel is warm and familiar. you beg for [[more.]]

you think you hear kotomine [[laugh.]]

(set:$day to 40)[[you don't care.]]

[[Emiya Shirou->shirou 40]] is happy. [[Kotomine Kirei->kirei 40]] is happy. [[Gilgamesh->gil 40]] is happy.

"sorry, kid," lancer says as he starts fucking you. he sounds genuinely apologetic, a little like he's ashamed. you're not sure what he's apologizing for. you feel so nice. everything feels nice. you look over [[to saber.]]

You've kept Lancer on patrol of the city almost nonstop since you brought Emiya into your home. The Grail is close to manifesting, and it would be so easy to kill Lancer and let this farce come to an end. But that isn't [[necessary.]]

Saber is even more responsive with Shirou in the same room. Kirei is taking him now, after Lancer's pitifully short performance, and Gilgamesh is passing the time until his turn touching Saber everywhere as she vainly struggles. Her body is tight with rage, her muscles tense and hard as steel, but she still unable to fight Enkidu's pull as Gilgamesh spreads her legs apart, sliding two fingers along her cunt until she's wet enough to press inside. She barely seems to notice, and he frowns, but chooses not to discipline her just yet. He's enjoying her fury enough to calm [[his own.]]

she's bound in these elaborate, beautiful chains, probably something gilgamesh saves for special occasions. she's gagged, so you can't tell what she's trying to say, but it's hard to keep your focus on that with lancer's cock pressing inside you. "no need to be gentle with him," kotomine says, and his arm glows with power. you think you hear saber scream. you [[can't imagine why.]]

lancer's face twists up, and he starts to fuck you harder, grabbing your hips with a servant's strength, breathing heavily by your ear as he bites down on your shoulder, making your eyes roll back and your voice cry out. your skin breaks under his fangs, and you know your blood is flooding his mouth. you beg him to go [[faster.]]

"you heard him," kotomine says, and lancer shouts in pain, but obeys. you're nearly ready to come just from this, but barely any more time passes before you feel lancer come inside you, panting. you smile up at saber. you've finally learned to [[make yourself happy.]]

you wonder if she's [[learned the same.]]

kotomine is next, once he's dismissed lancer, easily pushing himself inside with nothing but lancer's come to ease the way. it's been easy to take kotomine's cock since the first time. he's never gentle enough for you to hesitate, after all. gilgamesh is saying something to saber, one hand snaking down her chest. you're a little jealous. you want to be in [[saber's place.]]

kotomine grabs you by the chin and forces you to look at him, instead. you smile apologetically. it's so easy to get distracted, with so many people in the room - a more spacious bedroom than the usual one, allowing for an audience as you let yourself be pleasured while the other residents of the church [[watch.]]

kotomine is rough, but he hasn't done anything horrific to you since the first time he fucked you, preferring now to use your body in other ways that feel so much better. you always finish with bites and bruises, but no more broken bones or bleeding gashes. you think gilgamesh is [[proud of you.]]

he bites down hard, right next to where lancer left his mark, and you squirm against his body. you wrap your arms around him, digging your blunt nails into his back and leaving small scratches. you weren't bound today. gilgamesh [[trusts you.]]

your body goes tight as kotomine keeps biting down in the same spot, breaking skin and digging his teeth into exposed flesh, and it hurts, it's uncomfortable, but then kotomine presses deep inside you and comes, and you can't help but feel satisfaction at the result. you look up at [[your king.]]

gilgamesh takes his hands off saber to go to you. you see her struggle to break the chains in the background, and you think about telling her not to bother. trying to escape here is pointless, even unnecessary. she'll learn [[eventually.]]

when gilgamesh puts two fingers in your mouth, they don't taste like him. something familiar, and not unpleasant, but not him. you lick away whatever was on them, trying to reach something you're more [[used to.]]

gilgamesh laughs, looks back at saber, and then kisses you. you tune out the muffled [[scream.]]

"please, my king," you mumble against gilgamesh's mouth when he starts to pull back, and he laughs against yours. he never keeps you waiting [[for long.]]

you can't bring the rest of the world around you into focus. you don't particularly want to, either. letting yourself be used in the best way possible makes it hard to care for anything else. you love to be cared for. you love to be useful. you love to be [[happy.]]

when gilgamesh finally gets you off, you start to laugh, a rush of pure joy overwhelming your mind as your whole body relaxes under his hands. you only hope saber can learn to feel [[this way]], too.

(set: $day to 0)[[begin again?->start]]

You'd been confronted with two options, as Lancer quickly knocked the boy unconscious at your command. Either to kill Emiya now and continue your original plan, or to keep him with you, unable to foolishly alert anyone of the secrets he'd found. The choice was [[easy.]]

You decide to keep your new possession in another part of the basement for the first night, restraints already in place from years before Gilgamesh's current mana setup had been established. You tear the Command Seals from his hand once he's been properly secured and Gilgamesh has left to collect his own prize, and then all that's left is to wait for him to [[wake.]]

The fear in Emiya's eyes as he realizes he can't call for his Servant is powerful enough, but the way he looks at you once he truly starts to take stock of his situation is absolutely perfect. His horror, his hopelessness, his anger all melt into an incredible expression. You want to add [[pain.]]

You have plenty of tools for killing and maiming, and could always ask Gilgamesh for more, but the thought of breaking the boy //now// is so delicious that you don't even bother to consider all your options. Your fist collides with his stomach and you hear him choke on air, the breath forced out of his chest. He doesn't vomit, but you can tell it's [[close.]]

A few swift blows to the stomach and he can barely breathe, so you move to his face instead, intent on leaving him with beautifully blooming black eyes. His teeth catch his lip as he tries to cry out when you punch him in the jaw, and you watch it swell up, bright and bloody. You're smiling so hard you think your lips will split [[as well.]]

(set:$day to 2)When you finally knock him unconscious, completely by accident, you unchain him, analyze the severity of his wounds, and then move him upstairs to a small, unused guest room. The ropes you'd taken on the way out of the basement should do for now. You go to let Gilgamesh know where he can find the boy when it's [[his turn.->wake up.]]

(set:$day to 3)Her fear is [[even better.->" "]]

You've decided against idly chatting with Emiya for now. The silence is a little stifling, but the plan you've been forming should play out more smoothly if he receives as little interaction with you as possible aside from the pain. It seems to be working so far, judging by the terror on Emiya's face as you [[enter the basement.]]

"What do you want?!" he (link-reveal:"cries,")[ "I don't have a Servant!" he (link-reveal:"screams,")[ "//Stop//," he (link-reveal:"begs,")[ as you split his skin with the knife, sinking it deep into flesh and muscle, letting him languish in the sharp ache of the wound before you thrust your hand inside him to heal it. Then the process [[repeats.]]]]]

It's a simple means of administering pain, but an effective one on someone who hasn't fully trained himself to bear it, and thick sobs fill the air before you've even begun to satisfy yourself. You want to leave the wounds open longer, but all too often you find yourself digging deep enough to rupture something that could quickly prove fatal, despite your intimate knowledge of anatomy. And besides, the shrieks of primal discomfort at feeling his flesh and nerves twist and stretch to knit back together is entirely its own [[reward.]]

Today you've chosen to chain both his arms and legs in a harsh, brutal stretch, offering him barely any room to squirm away from your knife. Unfortunately, having him face the wall so as to give you better access to the thicker and less vulnerable muscles has also given you little chance to watch the expressions cross his face. But now that you're finished, you might as well take a [[peek.]]

(set: $day to 4)His face is a mess of tears and snot and spittle from sobbing and screaming, and the confusion and terror in his eyes almost startles you in its clarity, going right to your veins. You could stay here all night. But it's growing late, and you have dinner to prepare. You'll clean the knife [[well.->alone again.]]

"I'm content with my share for now," you say, keeping your breathing even with Gilgamesh's slow thrusts. It's not often you get to really indulge like this. "Ah, but I know you, Kirei." Gilgamesh bites at the point where your neck and shoulder meet, hard enough for you to notice, but not enough that it couldn't be called gentle. "The knife isn't enough to satisfy. You want to be there when his mind breaks." "And I will." You turn your head so the two of you can share a kiss, deep and intimate, years of familiarity sinking into your skin. "Assuming you continue to play your [[part.]]"

Gilgamesh smiles against your lips. "Your ideas are often interesting. I suppose I can continue my [[patronage.]]"

(set: $day to 9)You have so much to look [[forward to.->vomit.]]

It takes hardly any magic at all to keep him asleep through being cleaned inside and out, and once that duty is done, you only have to bind Emiya as Gilgamesh has requested. Then Gilgamesh does with Emiya what he will, sometimes feeding him before or after, until Emiya falls unconscious again. He'll return Emiya to the basement, to be chained according to your preference. And so it [[begins again.]]

Today, Emiya is in your care, and you've decided to indulge in a [[caning.]]

It's simple, even traditional, but you know firsthand from your school years exactly how brutal it can be. Emiya's arms are above his head again today, chained to a pivot so you may turn him around without crossing the chains. You start with the [[back.]]

His thighs bruise beautifully, paleness giving way to reds and purples and blues. His ass swells in harsh lines that you can't help but touch, pressing your thumb in until he can't shrink back from you any further, utterly powerless to do anything but [[accept the pain.]]

It would go easier and arouse less suspicion if you just told her that Emiya was [[dead.]]

(set: $day to 17)But would it be as [[fun?->you're not sure what.]]

But you have other ideas in mind to test out before you need to resort to any possible permanent changes. The piercing kit that just arrived in the mail, [[for one.]]

Traditional piercings you haven't much care for. The process of placing them is simple enough to wear out your interest quickly. But one photo you came across from a body modification magainze you leafed through during the process of ordering the kit sparked your [[attention.->interest.]]

The rings fit beautifully in Emiya's skin, slightly loosened by the weight he's already lost from being fed so little. He chokes on a new set of sobs with every punch of the needle, gags at the foreign sensation as you twist each ring in. You tug slightly on each one as you secure it, just to make sure it will survive your [[experiment.]]

You end with fourteen rings, seven on each vertical line, spaced several centimeters apart. Then, you reach into your box and grab the [[ribbon.]]

You thought about black, and the color would have been aesthetically pleasing, but your curiosity got the better of you. The white silk stains red from the moment you pick it up. The ends pick up more as you thread it through the first metal ring, and then more as you pull it across. You've never laced a corset before, but you understand the principle, weaving the ribbon back and forth into white and red silk diamonds patterned down Emiya's [[spine.]]

The result is [[breathtaking.]]

You hold both ends of the ribbon at the base of your project, considering whether to tie them off and simply admire your work. The wounds are swollen and angry, already rejecting the foreign bodies under Emiya's skin, and the white-red-pink of the ribbon looks like a painting, like a delicate work of art. You're going to [[ruin it.]]

Human skin is much more strong and elastic than the average person might think. In the right conditions, it can even bear the weight of a fully-grown man. Silk, however, is [[stronger.]]

When you start to pull the ends of the ribbon, Emiya nearly chokes on his own tongue, coughing and gagging through his wails as you stretch his skin to its limits. The first ring to pop from its place sends a full-body shudder through him, his cries giving way to low moans that seem almost relieved. The second, he goes even quieter. By the time the last wound is opened and you hold a knotted red ribbon strung with rings and scraps of flesh, his voice is entirely [[gone.]]

Emiya looks like a [[martyr.]]

(set: $day to 24)You touch the raw flesh of each new wound, letting him twitch and writhe, pulling weakly as far away from you as he can, and only on your third pass do you close them up. You'll need to do this [[again.->it isn't.]]

Emiya sounds like he's choking on his own pleas, trying so hard to hold them back but with no success. He whines and whimpers like a dog in heat, his voice high and wanton as Gilgamesh ruins Emiya's expectations for any other body. "Please," you hear him say again, the word sounding painful to speak, "my [[king.]]"

(set: $day to 33)You hold in your laughter. You wish you could see Emiya's face, but you can be patient. With any luck, the broken adoration for his new king will be a permanent fixture for you to observe at a [[later date.->it's not unpleasant.]]

Emiya doesn't blink when you make the first cut, across his wrist held slightly above his head, palm-out. The second cut gets a twitch from the corner of his mouth. By the tenth, tears are falling freely from his [[eyes.]]

When you've finished with his arms, he [[starts laughing.]]

His laughter grows louder and more uncontrollable the more you cut him, and it makes it difficult to run straight lines across his chest. You can't bring yourself to [[mind.]]

He looks perfect like this, bleeding everywhere you look, breath hitching from sobs and laughter, body twitching away from the pain only to be met with more from the act of trying to escape. When you start to slice down his legs, you watch his toes twitch. When you cut across those as well, they keep twitching, but with the added bonus of blood dribbling and Emiya's breath catching at every small movement. You want to [[take him.]]

(set: $day to 34)You satisfy yourself with a few touches down his chest. The texture is pleasing, as is the sound of Emiya gagging. You can [[wait for tomorrow.]]

You've been very precise in your scheduling, careful with what sort of stimuli he experiences and at what times. You've consulted with Gilgamesh on Emiya's progress, and seen and heard the results firsthand. Yesterday, you put Emiya through enough pain to leave him in hysterics. Today, he'll be expecting a relaxing reprieve with [[Gilgamesh.]]

You open the door. Emiya's face down on the bed, bound to the corners of the bed the way you left him. He's breathing hard, and his ass is in the air, clearly waiting for someone to [[fill it.]]

When he turns his head, his already flushed face goes pale. You can't help but smile in return. "No," he stutters, "No, [[no-]]"

But once you put your hands on him, his whole body is shuddering with need, and he bites his lip as you place a hand on his lower back. You expect him to melt easily into your touch, so conditioned to accept any amount of pleasure he can manage from his days without torture. You don't expect him to [[beg for it.]]

"Please," he moans as you work him open, "Please, fuck me, please, //more//-" You [[oblige.]]

After spending this long toying with his body for one singular purpose, playing with his nerves on the opposite end of the spectrum is its own kind of satisfaction. His broken moans and needy words are just as sweet as his screams of pain, built up as they are by weeks of forcing him to accept the pleasure from anyone who would give it to him. You feel laughter bubble up from your chest as you work yourself inside of him. It's better than you've ever felt [[with Gilgamesh.]]

Emiya claws at the bedsheets with his limited movement, wordless cries falling from his lips as you fuck him hard. You're not sure how gentle Gilgamesh has been with him so far, but Emiya can clearly handle it, his voice going high and sweet as you grab his hips with bruising force, his breath becoming harsher with each rough thrust. You experimentally fist a hand in his hair, grown out slightly from his time here, and he wails in pain, but you can hear a soft //yes, yes// from under his breath. You've [[never been happier.]]

When you come, it's with a rush of heat that rarely runs through your cold body, and you feel full and satiated even as you empty yourself inside of Emiya. Your breath runs ragged and your body shakes, and it takes a good few minutes for you to collect yourself again. Emiya squirms underneath you, mumbling into the mattress. [["Yes?"]]

You lean down to hear him more clearly, but all you can catch is a litany of //please, please, please, please//. "Speak up," you say, and wrench his head back by the hair. "What do you want?" Emiya goes silent for a moment, mouth opening and closing with no sound, and then, "//Please//." His hips grind minutely into the bed, still held fast in your grip. "I'm so close, I need it, please, let me-" His pathetic pleas cut off as you reach down to wrap a hand around his cock. You hold him [[still.]]

"This is what you want?" you ask, lips nearly touching the shell of his ear, your hand unmoving. Emiya nods furiously, his whole body shaking with need. You want to keep him here for hours, trapped on a razor's edge, begging fruitlessly for release until his body starts to register the pleasure as nothing but the pain you're used to meting out to him. You decide to be [[generous.]]

(set: $day to 40)You've seen Emiya's tears plenty of times by now, but somehow, they seem so new, falling freely into his mouth and onto the sheets as his cries morph from //please// to //thank you//. His body looks so small, shaking and writhing underneath yours. You think you'll [[take it again->you don't care.]]

Lancer knows better than to attack Saber without your direct order, but that doesn't seem to stop him from staring at her, chained in the bonds of Enkidu. Emiya lays on the bed, unbound, legs spread for Gilgamesh to work him open, already hard. His eyes are unfocused, and you would almost think he'd been drugged, but you know Gilgamesh prefers him [[sober.]]

Lancer stands by your side at attention, but relaxes uneasily when you nod towards Emiya and say, [["Fuck him."]]

"Seriously?" Lancer takes a step forward. "Why is that necessary? And I don't know about you all, but this isn't exactly my- He's just a kid!" You smile at him. "Don't assume you have a [[choice.]]"

Lancer looks ready to lunge at you before the Command Spell takes effect, twisting his body to face Emiya and dematerializing his clothes. "Sorry, kid," he mumbles, and presses into him without any further complaint. Emiya [[sighs.]]

Lancer goes slow, fucking into him in shallow thrusts at an easy pace, even planting a soft kiss against his neck, his shoulders. Ever the hero. "No need to be gentle with him," you say, preparing [[another Command Spell.]]

Lancer shouts and bites down on Emiya's shoulder. That wasn't part of the order, but you're more than satisfied with the result. Lancer's fingers curl around Emiya's hips, and you can already imagine the bruises that will form by the time it's [[your turn.]]

You dismiss Lancer once he's finally worked himself up to an orgasm, ignoring the scowl he shoots you as his form fades. Emiya welcomes you easily inside him, as he always does lately, so relaxed and open to you now that your treatment of him has [[shifted.]]

His eyes drift over to Saber, still struggling against her chains. Gilgamesh doesn't seem to have broken her in very well on his own. You grab Emiya by the chin, forcing him to look you in the eye. He [[smiles.]]

You decide to [[forgive him.]]

You bite down on his shoulder, just next to where Lancer had left his mark, and dig your teeth in until you taste blood. Emiya doesn't struggle. He only moans, begs for more, and [[submits.]]

You swallow the blood in your mouth as you keep your teeth sunk in, relishing in Emiya's noises that morph into discomfort, then pain, but never pleas to stop. You come when his voice [[breaks.]]

He looks so satisfied when you finally let go of him. Perfectly content to be broken by you. Perfectly willing to take more. You almost tell Gilgamesh to leave, so you can have him [[again.]]

But you stand up and leave the room, satisfied to leave him for another day. After all, you have [[plenty of time.->this way]]

The fight does not last. Saber is clearly full of energy, prepared for a difficult battle with a strong opponent, but her rage and worry blind her, making her vulnerable. Gilgamesh, his awareness of her power sharpened by their most recent meeting, does not let his guard down in her presence again, instead making full use of the Noble Phantasms at his disposal. Her body is pierced again and again with his blades, pinning her to the ground, and her hidden sword is knocked just out of her reach. She is helpless to resist the chains that snake around her body, twining between her legs and forcing her arms still. Her pretty mouth is denied speech as a length of chain binds her face, and her throat is threatened with a tight noose, only a snap of Gilgamesh's fingers away from breaking her neck. Gilgamesh dismisses the blades that restrain her now that her body is fully incapacitated, and takes his prize [[inside.]]

She does not stop struggling the whole way, nearly breaking out of Gilgamesh's grip as he carries her to the church, but the Chains of Heaven hold fast, keeping her in his arms as he holds her like the bride she should rightfully be. He returns to his own chambers, a spacious bedroom that he rarely uses for its intended purpose, content instead to use the time humans would spend sleeping enjoying the night in his own ways. But to finally have something worth coming back to his room for is a joyous occasion, one that must be [[celebrated.]]

(set: $day to 2)And he [[does.->wake up.]]

But his feet yield the most perfect screams when they're struck, his face contorting, his eyes streaming without end. You strike the same spots again and again, wishing you could watch him try to walk on the bruises in the morning. But, though they will heal too soon for your enjoyment, you at least get to watch him stand once you take the footstools [[away.]]

(set: $day to 14)Another [[perfect day.->tomorrow.]]

Kirei smiles. "What spills forth from the Grail can give Saber the form you seek, it's true. However, it's not impossible that the process will have a negative effect on the purity of her Spirit Origin. And, pardon me if I presume," he continues, his smile growing, "but do you not want to be the one who has the greatest impact on her?" Gilgamesh's eyes widen in understanding. "You may have a point. To bind her to me without first breaking her thoroughly would be a waste." He smiles back at the priest, and a curious affectionate rises easily inside him even after all these years. "Your perspective is, as always, [[insightful.]]"

"What of your captive?" he asks then. "What are your plans for him and the Grail?" "Oh, no, he's nothing more than an amusement." Gilgamesh grins slyly. "And the fact that he is an Emiya is of no consequence?" "I did not say that." Kirei leans back in his chair to stare at the ceiling. "I simply have less of a desire to find myself in him, than I do to find pleasure through him." "Oh?" "It is as I suggested to you. To break the spirit entirely is something I can't say I'm not intrigued by." "Do you require any assistance?" Kirei's smile looks lovely like this, his teeth bared in anticipation. "[[Actually...]]"

(set: $day to 3)Gilgamesh wouldn't dare allow Kirei to touch his most prized possession. But he has plenty of reason to help Kirei take care of [[his own.->" "]]

He was gentle with her, that first night, laying soft kisses upon her palms, up her arm, at her throat, around the edges of her mouth where a gag still silenced her. Kirei suggested keeping her presence hidden from Shirou for now, to further sweeten the expression on his face when he first sees his beloved Servant broken, and Gilgamesh was so enchanted by the idea he'd agreed. Saber continued to struggle uselessly against the chain that encircled her limbs and held her spread-eagle on her back, but even her lack of Divinity could not save her from Enkidu's hold, weak as she was with the dregs of her Master's mana fading. Now, two days later, her form is sustained by Gilgamesh's seed alone. It would certainly be easier for Kirei to force a contract, or even supply her with mana through his abundance of Command Spells, but Gilgamesh sees no reason why he would need to go a day without transferring his own mana into her through the [[path of least resistance.]]

Her muffled cries were delicious the first time he tasted her cunt, her breath coming quickly as he licked and sucked at her as he pleased until she was wet enough for his cock, and she'd nearly screamed as he'd entered her, her hands balling into fists, her eyes aflame with fury, and Gilgamesh nearly forgot to move with how lost he became in her gaze. Now, however, she barely flinches as Gilgamesh fucks her, her eyes closed tight and her jaw set in defiance. "There's no need to hide your reactions, Saber," he says, one hand carding through her hair - loosed from its usual prim style, leaving her looking even more vulnerable and undone. "You're free to express anything you feel, now. I'm the only one by your side." Saber does not respond, not even to glare at him. It's been like this since he'd entered the room; she offers no evidence of pain nor pleasure, save for the barest uncontrollable twitches of her muscles and the slightest intake of breath that she tries to suppress. It's irritating how well she manages to keep herself neutral and unaffected, but nonetheless charming to see the minute [[cracks.]]

(set: $day to 4)She does not break even after Gilgamesh grows bored and finally finishes inside of her, and he sees only the faintest flush on her cheeks as he pulls out and watches the evidence of his violation seep out of her. Her thighs do not twitch inwards in an attempt at modesty as they have in previous encounters, but her muscles remain taut and strained. Gilgamesh tries to curb his annoyance. This must be a step forwards towards her eventual collapse, not backwards. [[Time will tell.->alone again.]]

The wine isn't from his grandest stock, of course, but Emiya Shirou probably couldn't tell the difference even fully recovered. It won't do to render his throat so dry that he falls silent. And there's no harm in making him a little more pliable. It's not something Gilgamesh plans to do often; after all, being drugged gives one an excuse to pass off all thoughts and actions as false, once one is sober again. There is a reason he'll wait for some time before sharing his stores with Saber. But he can't help but enjoy the dizzy look of a child tasting alcohol for what is likely his first time, and the eagerness of Shirou's body responding to Gilgamesh's touch even as his mouth protests is enough to [[please him.]]

By now, Gilgamesh has a full understanding of the boy's body. He's still growing, still coming into his senses, and welcomes a foreign touch as easily as any healthy man his age might. His inexperience leaves him vulnerable to even the slightest sensation, but the experiences he has had - those he has surely only shared with Saber - have left him with the expectation of giving, rather than receiving, pleasure. A waste, Gilgamesh thinks, of such an opportunity he had to take all he could from her. He decides to show Shirou the full, paralyzing helplessness of being gifted with pleasure too strong to resist, while foregoing his own. Not because Gilgamesh has no desire this evening, but to simply prove a point: the boy's body will always betray him under Gilgamesh's hand. His fingers reach deep inside of Shirou, pressing exactly where Gilgamesh knows he needs it most, until Shirou is panting like a dog and humping the mattress just as pathetically. "No," Gilgamesh says, "I don't think that will be [[allowed]] today."

(set: $day to 9)The boy is denied any relief, any touch that is not Gilgamesh's, and he can see the moment this finally sinks in, because Shirou's eyes fill with tears, and he begs for mercy. "Stop!" he cries, and Gilgamesh does not, knowing full well that the plea is half-hearted. A poor attempt at hiding his true feelings, which only grow stronger the longer Gilgamesh works him over, until his eyes are glazed with want and his body is tight with need. It takes little work to make him finally come apart, his legs spasming as he comes untouched, almost certainly for the first time in his young life. Really, the only words that belong on his lips are "[[thank you.->vomit.]]"

(set: $day to 14)"Do you enjoy mocking me, King of Knights?" he asks, one hand on her throat, barely holding back from pressing his full weight down as he thrusts into her. "Or do you simply wish this to be a lengthy courtship? I have offered you countless gifts, promised all manner of reward, and still you refuse me." He changes the angle of his hips again, for what feels like the thousandth time, and though her eyes prick with tears and she chokes on a breathless gasp, her gaze is still unfalteringly //unimpressed//. Not for the first time, he slaps her hard across the face, rage smoldering behind red eyes. "Any woman would beg and bargain and kill for the chance to lie with me. What could possibly stand between us and the bliss you so richly deserve?" Saber does not reply. He removes his hand from her throat, but even without a gag, she has taken to giving him nothing but silence, which is somehow more enraging than if she'd curse Gilgamesh with every word. But Gilgamesh has plenty of time, and even more techniques at his [[disposal.->tomorrow.]]

(set: $day to 17)He expects the shock, the fury, the screaming accusations and demands, but what he doesn't expect is how easily it stops. As soon as he wraps one hand around Shirou's cock and the other gently around his throat, the protests halt entirely. There is fear in his eyes, an understandable terror of being punished for this bout of defiance, but it gradually fades as Gilgamesh continues to stroke his still fully hard cock. Shirou swears - though to whom, it is unclear - and his eyes start to slip shut, his tears flowing helplessly. Gilgamesh continues to fuck him, slow and thorough, in precise movements that make Shirou's cock jump with every stroke and his jaw relax from tight anger to slack, languid pleasure. Saber's name does not fall from Shirou's lips [[again.->you're not sure what.]]

(set: $day to 24)He pulls the knife from Saber's gut, and she shouts, louder than he's heard her the entire time she's been his. He targets her thigh next, marring the smooth skin with a wide, angry gash. It almost pains him to inflict such ugliness on something so lovely, but his anger and impatience outweigh his desire for her perfection now, and anyway, she's been given sufficient mana reserves. She'll heal before long. Though his desire to observe human suffering is not as innate or as powerful as Kirei's, he can still appreciate the screams that rip from Saber's throat, the way her lovely eyes fill with tears as he drives the knife into her wrist, pinning it down the way he'd pinned her by the leg that night in the Fuyuki of ten years past. The grinding of metal on bone, the gasp of breath as she can no longer hold in her wails of anguish - all of it suits her beautifully. Perhaps he'll keep playing this game with her [[for a while.->it isn't.]]

He starts slowly, patiently, teasing the boy's legs apart with a gentle but firm grip. Shirou's eyes are closed, his jaw set, clearly determined to ignore Gilgamesh today. Gilgamesh had assumed they'd trained a little more of this pointless resistance out of him. But he remains undeterred, placing gentle kisses along Shirou's inner thighs, listening carefully for the soft needy sounds Shirou can never hold in as Gilgamesh sucks a bruise just inches away from his still soft cock. It doesn't [[stay that way for long.]]

Shirou bites down on his tongue as Gilgamesh starts to use his own, licking up his shaft and sucking at the head, smiling around his cock as it starts to fill. The boy is fully hard in barely any time at all, despite his obvious and futile efforts to resist, and Gilgamesh seizes the opportunity to take him into his throat. He grips Shirou's hips hard, pressing them down into the bed to keep him still as he swallows him down fully with practiced ease. It's hardly a challenge, and he's quickly rewarded with the way Shirou relaxes into his touch, voice loosened in pleasure. And then, the magic word: //[["Please-"]]//

(set: $day to 33)Gilgamesh moves his mouth away. [[He's won.->it's not unpleasant.]]

Saber's cock stays almost entirely soft no matter how he toys with it. Today, not for the first time, he grants her his mouth - kissing the length of her, inhaling her scent, tonguing at the line between her cock and cunt that once drew a proper reaction from her. His efforts are, as usual, in vain, barely eliciting a blink, so he stares up at her as his mouth comes off with an unsatisfying pop. His voice is casual. "You know, your former Master //enjoys// what I can do with my mouth." Saber's face does not move, but Gilgamesh does not miss the twitch of her sword hand. [[He smiles.]]

"It's true. Just the other day I had him begging for my tongue. //Please, my king//. //I need you, my king.//" He thumbs at the head of Saber's cock idly, cataloguing her every miniscule reaction. "It's gratifying to see that //someone// has accepted their rightful ruler." Saber's jaw tightens. Gilgamesh's heart [[soars.]]

(set: $day to 34)He does not make Saber come that night. But he does make her angry, no matter how hard she tries to hide it. In the end, that is nearly [[enough->wait for tomorrow.]]

(set: $day to 40)Shirou's voice cries out in a clear sign of climax, and Gilgamesh can just make out a strained //thank you// before his harsh breathing begins to fade. Saber stares at the wall as if attempting to burn straight through it, then blinks once - and begins to cry, tears falling clear and beautiful. She has not wept openly since her confinement began. Gilgamesh does not let her tears go to waste. They taste [[better than wine.->you don't care.]]

Kirei finishes inside of Shirou and leaves the room without a word, barely tucked back into his clothes. Gilgamesh is almost insulted at how little he seems to care about savoring the boy he put so much effort into breaking. No matter. Gilgamesh lets go of Saber and strides over to the bedside, offering his slick fingers to Shirou, who sucks greedily at them, not seeming to recognize or even acknowledge the taste of Saber on his king's skin. He's only looked over at her a few times this entire evening, and his attention never particularly seems to catch. Did he ever truly care for her in the [[first place?]]

He kisses Shirou's lips, and Saber screams, thrashing harder the longer Shirou spends kissing him back. "Please, my king," he whispers, and Gilgamesh gives him exactly what he wants, fucking into him just how Shirou wants it, mouthing at all the spots where he's learned Shirou is weak, stroking him until he's babbling pleas and praise and welcoming every inch of his king's affection. Shirou laughs when he comes. Saber goes [[silent.]]

Perhaps she can be [[broken->this way]] after all.

(enchant: ?page, (text-colour: black) + (background: white))(enchant: ?link, (text-color: blue))//my collapsed body (until the end)// **fate/stay night, fate route kotomine kirei/emiya shirou, gilgamesh/emiya shirou, kotomine kirei/gilgamesh, kotomine kirei/gilgamesh/emiya shirou, gilgamesh/artoria pendragon, and some cú chulainn/emiya shirou. this fic contains established emiya shirou/artoria pendragon, but the primary content of the ship is NTR/cuckolding. please be advised.** the following game/fic is separated into three "routes," which are not diverging story paths, but instead, different perspectives on the same story. the routes can be played in any order, and you can switch freely between routes after each scene. **all routes contain elements of nonconsensual sex with a character under the age of 18, torture, and heavy manipulation/mindbreak.** for in-depth content information and warnings, which may include spoilers, [[click here.]] to start, [[click here.->start]]

(enchant: ?page, (text-colour: black) + (background: white))(enchant: ?link, (text-color: blue))**the emiya shirou route contains:** (click:"emiya shirou")[-bondage -gore -mention of vomit -ryona/heavy beating -nonconsensual sex -knife play -dehumanization -forced orgasm -caning -body piercing -implied disembowlment -conditioning -suicidal ideation -mindbreak] **the kotomine kirei route contains:** (click:"kotomine kirei")[-ryona/heavy beating -bondage -gore -mention of vomit -knife play -caning -corset piercing -mindbreak/barely consensual sex] **the gilgamesh route contains:** (click:"gilgamesh")[-nonconsensual sex -torture -NTR/cuckolding -mindbreak] to start, [[click here->start]]