when you dream, you dream about [[him]].
your brother's body is made of:
[[meat]]
[[bone]]
[[light]]flesh is (link-reveal:"soft")[
flesh is (link-reveal:"wet")[
his skin is (link-reveal:"soft")[
except where it (link-goto:"isn't")]]]he has died but never (link-reveal:"decayed")[
you've never seen his skeleton except when he's still (link-reveal:"complaining")[
and you're giving him whiskey to (link-reveal:"shut him up")[
and you splint it the best you can so you don't see it for long (link-reveal:"anyway")[
(live:2s)[ [[until next time]] ]]]]]when you see him, you go (link-reveal:"blind")[
you screwed in that bulb (live:.7s)[(stop:)and then
(live:.5s)[(stop:)got startled when it turned (link-reveal:"on?")[
you're a shitty [[mechanic]] ]]]]his hands, his face, everywhere the sun and the dirt and the blood hits, is rougher.
(live:3s)[(stop:)but it still]
(live:4s)[(stop:)splits]
(live:5s)[(stop:)[[open]]]in your dream, you have him tied. splayed. constricted. (link-reveal:"kept open by locks.")[
in your dream, he is (live:10ms)[(either:"screaming","sobbing","crying","praying","breathing","begging","hoping","gagging","choking","sweating","laughing")]
(live:6s)[and you are [[making him]] ]]in your dream, you see someone (link-reveal:"inside him")[
and it's (link:"not you")[an angel
(live:1s)[(stop:)with too many (link-reveal:"mouths")[ that belong to your brother
(live:2s)[(stop:)and [[not you]] ]]]]]in your dream, someone is behind you
he is your
[[father]]
[[teacher]]
[[self]]his ribs keep his [heart]<heart| safe.
(live:2s)[(animate:?heart,"pulse")(stop:)if you pulled on them (link-reveal:"hard enough")[,
you could give him [[wings->making him]] ]](set:$age to 5)(set: $verb to "save")in your dream, you are [$age]<1| years old and you [(link-repeat:$verb)[(set:$age to it+1)(rerun:?1){
(if:$age < 46 and $age % 2 is 0)[(set:$verb to "love")(rerun:?verbin)]
(if:$age < 46 and $age % 2 is 1)[(set:$verb to "save")(rerun:?verbin)]
(if:$age >=46)[(replace:?verbin)[leave](live:3s)[(replace:?try)[you wish you could [[try again->start]] ]]]
}]]<verbin| him
[]<try|he says
(live:1s)[(stop:)"you have to do [[this]]"]he says
(live:1s)[(stop:)"i'm so proud of you"
(live:2s)[(stop:)you wish he was [[lying->ending]] ]]you say [[nothing]]**this** is [[the worst thing in the world->ending]]you say [[nothing.]]you hear something [[crack->ending]]in your dream, you kill your brother.
he dies of
[[asphyxiation]]
[[exsanguination]]
[[appreciation]]you use your belt, you use a rope, you use anything, anything but your (link-reveal:"hands")[, because if you (text-color:blue)[**touch**](mouseover:"touch")[(change:"touch",(text-color:white)) his skin you might [[lose your nerve->hrgh]] ]]his throat is (link-reveal:"slit.")[ his wrists are (link-reveal:"slit.")[ his thighs are (link-reveal:"split.")[
a pyre is [[lit]] ]]]you keep him safe.
you keep him safe.
you keep him safe.
you keep him [[safe-->hrgh]]the smoke fills your lungs, and you gasp for more, (live:1s)[more][]<more|(live:2s)[(append:?more)[, *more*]]
(live:3.5s)[(stop:)you let him [[fill->hrgh]] you.]it doesn't matter.
either way
he's [[gone.]]and then
(live:6s)[(stop:)[[you wake up]] ](enchant:?page, (bg:white)+ (text-color:black))"Dean?"
(live:3s)[(stop:)"You were screaming in your sleep again."]
(live:5s)[(stop:)"I'm not really sure how to [[stop]] it."](enchant:?page, (bg:white)+ (text-color:red+black))(enchant:?fine's chars, via (t8n-delay:pos*.1s)+(t8n:"instant"))[**"I'm fine, Sammy."**]<fine|
(live:5s)[(stop:)**You're fine.**]
(live:8s)[ [["Go back to sleep." ->start]] ]